Insomnia

It's 2:30 in the morning here and I am awake.

I got back to Munich at 10:30 this morning and felt pretty good. My bags, which were clearly well over 50 lbs, somehow passed muster and were sent on their way without any surcharges. It was stressful making my connection in Philadelphia due to several delays on my first flight. All in all, it worked out fine and M. met me at the airport grinning ear to ear.

It was one of those lazy kinds of days in Munich. The bushes bordering our yard are covered in emerald green leaves and the grass is lush and thick now. If you can use this word for a yard, it feels cozy now. The sky was overcast all day and as the evening set in so did the rain, coming down harder and harder and making that rushing sound in the tree leaves that I love.

M. went to the butcher and got some chicken breasts and I felt like cooking so I did. I made Dijon chicken, rosemary and garlic mashed potatoes and a salad. It was basic but delicious.

We tore through all the suitcases to examine the goods and they all survived intact. I was peeking out the window from the bedroom and I saw M. out in the rain checking out all his new accessories for the grill (or asses-soirs as he calls them). I gave him a lot of grief over lugging all that stuff over but it warmed my heart to see him so happy to finally have them.

NASN was playing the Sox-Tampa Bay game from last night and since I was on a plane and M. was sleeping, neither of us had seen it so we watched. The window was open, the breeze was blowing in and it could have been any late spring day, in any year, in any place of my life. It was a great welcome home.

Yet somehow I don't feel content. I'm not quite sure why. It's sad to leave my family, I'm tired and jet lagged, I want to avoid work on Monday in the worst way, vacation is coming to an end - these are all good reasons to be out of sorts. M. picked up on my mood and tried to pull it out of me but what can you say when it's really just a feeling, or a mix of feelings, and not a problem that you can just pinpoint and fix?

Posted from Munich